The images originate from childhood photographs and previous personal archive projects. In making theses images, I wanted to aim toward a kind of knowing that comes out of a deeper understanding of my “pattern” of attachment which were solidified in childhood. I am making a play on words as the kind of “pattern” I am referring to is the literal patterned/colored materials that cover the remembered scenes of my childhood. The curtains, the rugs, the quilts the upholstery and clothing, their color ways textures and smells a visceral hyperlink to a kind of original knowing, sensing and belonging.
Over the course of 10 days I created 10, 10 min collages. Prior to the 10 min making session, I took digital images and isolated certain patterns, words and gestures with an editing tool. Each visual fragment was given its own “layer” within the digital editing platform. Within the 10 min, I manipulated the overlay of images by “turning on” the different layers. New associations within traditional memory were created by this visual mash up of fragments. The clips of patterned material floating in non traditional pictoral relationship including fragmented bodies, create new relationships within memory.
Free form notes from when I was in the act of making.
Softness as a radical act of expression in a structured, “hard” world.
Material patterns in the environment as caregivers capable of attachment. What cared for me? Florals, plaids, the certain colors of brown and blue that were popular in interior decor in 1970s
Fabric (couches, rugs, clothing) as proxies (wire mothers) to the natural world- our original environment. Our experience of being safely attached to the land interrupted my modern affordable luxuries?
My grandfather did not sleep inside until he was an adult. He spent his childhood outside with the animals and the land.
My disease: feeling chronically unrooted. Solution: Tie yourself to a past that you feel attached to, even if it is not “mother” nature it is a kind of mother.
Can I tether myself back to original desire, joy, experience to acknowledge the original patterns that I loved? That they are the materials for my “natural” world. They are the hills and valley’s that I roamed- the body of the constructed interior mother. They are the root of an aesthetic love affair.
When I am creating out of this orientation what are the raw material I can use to locate this for myself? Photographs, objects recombined to better identify my aesthetic caregiver.